I admit that I am a hopeless romantic. Lately, I've been a hapless romantic.
It is frustrating investing time to get to know someone and get your hopes built up over something only to watch it come to an end. I did that in my last relationship. I bent over backwards to make sure I was always available and very rarely received the same treatment. It is truly humbling when you come to the realization that no matter what YOU do, you can't change a person. You can only change how you decide to handle your life.
I often joke around and warn people that past relationships have made me tough and skeptical. All jokes aside, it sucks when I have to constantly question feelings that once came so easy for me. It sucks that I may potentially treat 'the one' like shit for awhile until I can truly trust him with me heart. At the end of the day, isn't that what we all want? That one special person that will guard your heart. I hope one day I get to that point. In the meanwhile, I will continue to be hopeful...and sleepless! :)
Sleepless in Beantown
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