Ladies, Let's face it. We are all searching for the cream of the crop. Alot of times, we have to dig all the way down to the bottom of the barrel to find that hidden gem. The key is to not give up on all the fabulous men that are out there for the taking. Lately, I've come across alot of men who talk an INCREDIBLE game, but they don't have the attributes to back it up. Am I preaching to someone with this one? You know the type. He's the guy you see promoting all the hot events in your town. You see him out at the club alot, poppin' bottles. Then, when you finally exchange information, he's on the phone claiming he's the illest club promoter around but you soon discover he's still taking the T to get to his events or bumming a ride from chicks he claims are just 'his friends'! Ugh. So over it. So over him. So over THEM!
How do you know when a guy you meet REALLY HAS IT GOING ON? Here's a hint...it's more than the material things. Check out my thoughts:
1. He always sees the glass half-full
Forget what you heard, optimism is so sexy. A man who is his BIGGEST cheerleader without being extremely cocky is a man that has it going on. Optimists see the best in every situation, no matter how grim. He is the opposite of all those naysayers and haters that you may encounter on a daily basis. It is so important to seek out this quality in a man because it's not always going to be roses.
2. His future is so bright, you need to wear SPF 50 around him
A man with a plan is a man that has it going on. He doesn't necessarily have to come equipped with the Beamer, Benz or Bentley...but it sure would be a good look to know that he's motivating on a future that will put him in a position to be happy. See, let me explain something to you. Don't think Trey Songz is ONLY desirable because he thinks he invented sex. The ladies REALLY started feeling Trey when he said, 'I just wanna be...I just wanna be successful!' That shit is sexy. Potential is a beautiful thing. Ask Michelle Obama. She'll tell you. When she met Barack, he was driving a beat up ol' car with a hole in the floor. But she saw his potential...now look at them!
3. He recognizes your worth
It is so great when a man sees you as the main course and not a side dish. He wants to fit in your life. He recognizes your worth. This is VERY IMPORTANT LADIES. A man that has it going on will treat you more precious than gold. This concept should remain universal. Pay attention if signs reveal to you that there is no room in his life for you. Also, ask the question up front. Simply say, 'Where do I fit in your life?' One of the biggest reasons why we meet men who turn out to be wrong for us is because we set these unrealistic expectations upon them without finding out what they are looking for in a relationship. Keep the lines of communication open. A man that recognizes your worth will want you by his side.
4. He knows his faith
A man that has it going on is a faithful man. I'm not saying that he should be sitting in the first pew at your church every Sunday, but he should respect the role of religion and live each day to the best of his ability. Often times, we look towards the church when it gets rough. A man that has it going on will know when to give glory and honor to the most high at his best and worst. Trust me, this attribute is important.
and finally...
5. He aims to please
There are so many reasons why we choose the men we choose to have in our lives. But, above all, you should always ask yourself this question: Does he make me smile? A man that has it going on will do everything in his power to make sure that you are always happy. When is the last time your man made you smile? I'm talking about one of those big ol' kool-aid smiles! You'd be amazed at how the smallest gesture can make the biggest impact. If he understands this, he's a keeper!
What's the moral of the story? Don't settle for less than mediocre. Seek out these men that 'got it going on'. They exist. You just have to go out there and look for them. ;)
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